Bukkake Videos, and 9 Other Fascinating Sexual Acts You’ve Probably Never Heard Of (Or Were Too Scared to Ask About)

Admit it, you’ve been awkwardly laughing at jokes that involve these foreign and sometimes really confusing terms for ages. We don’t blame you. But you have to admit… you’re a little curious as to what they’re all about.

You see it all the time in movies, people will talk about rusty trombones, golden showers, or even *squirm* the infamous dirty sanchez. Somehow we were all able to figure out what these really random, sometimes racist, and almost always mostly uncomfortable “sexual acts” are. The problem is, that as societies become more and more comfortable with their own sexuality, more and more fascinating, horrifying, or just plain weird sex acts keep cropping up. We don’t blame you for not having the balls to google half of these things, (as I’m pretty sure my personal MacBook has at least seven STD’s now) so we’ve done all the hard work for you and have de-mystified some of the newest, and weirdest, sex acts you’ve never heard of.

  1. Bukkake Videos

If you haven’t sat yourself down with a bag of popcorn and some quality bukkake videos, what are you even doing with your life? Okay, forget the popcorn, because Bukkake videos are not for the faint of heart or those who have a weak stomach. But, for those that are into them, they’re generally comprised of some super hot chick, getting covered in a load (I mean load, I didn’t even know males were capable of producing that much semen) of super hot man juice. It’s basically a circle jerk where the cum winds up being rubbed, shot, or thrown, onto the woman at the center of the ring. If she’s a good sport, she gargles, if she’s a great sport, she swallows.

  1. Docking

Docking is maybe the most special of the special. It all begins when two uncut male penises love each other. Very much… So maybe that’s not how all versions of the birds and the bees should start out, but it’s definitely how Docking does. Anyway, the first male, pulls his foreskin back as far as he can, while the second male places his foreskin over the head of the first males penis, then the first male takes his foreskin and stretches it over the second males foreskin, his penis, and the second males penis. Each penis tip is now nose to nose, wrapped in a sheath of foreskin, creating a sort of chinese finger trap situation. Both guys then proceed to wax on and wax off, jacking themselves off as one, until they each explode in intensive and intimate joy. Beautiful, isn’t it?

  1. ATM

While this one may seem a little more familiar than any of the others, we’re not talking about cash withdrawal. ATM, or “Ass To Mouth”, is all the rage of the millennial community, possibly, second only to bukkake videos. While ATM actually has a lot of innocent meanings, and not just in the banking world, when meant sexually it’s a whole new level of gross. ATM is essentially a practice where a woman let’s a man (or chick with a strap on. Spoiler alert: see pegging), penetrate her anally then proceeds to put said penis into her own mouth. Which, sure, seems fine as long as there’s a solid moment taken to clean any possible E.Coli inspiring microbes off your partner’s cock first, but with proper ATM, there is no cleaning. It’s exactly as advertised. Ass directly inTo Mouth.

  1. Supermaning

This one is actually kinda sweet if you think about it. Kinda… So picture this: You’re having some wild, intimate, and exciting doggy style sex with your loved one. He cums all over you, and in the heat of exhaustion, you roll over onto your back, skipping the post coidal embrace, to fall peacefully asleep. Upon waking, you realize that your man’s love juice has fused your sheet to your back. The second you stand up in an attempt to rectify the situation, you then find yourself parading around the apartment with a sheet firmly adhered to your shoulders like the billowing cape that keeps all of Gotham safe. And suddenly, you realize you’ve met every goal you’ve ever set for yourself, and you are most definitely a superhero.

  1. Pegging

Pegging, if for nothing else, is something we should all be aware about based solely on the gender advances that it has displayed in the last few years. Stick with us. What was once relegated to the backrooms and dungeons of your perfectly normal, heterosexual households everywhere, has now made its way into homosexual relationships as well. Hooray women’s lib! Formally known as when a woman straps on an oversized, silicone penis, and drills her male partner in the ass, it has now become an accepted past time of some lesbian couples as well. Pegging for all! Huzzah!

  1. Furry Parties

Furry parties are not only disturbing, they’re also a ton of fun! Essentially, they can happen anywhere, but like any true geek knows, the best role play happens in the forest. “Furries” are consenting adult sex parties where everyone gets dressed up as wild animals, and acts accordingly. Inhibitions are tossed out the window and these, sometimes whimsical, mythical, or incredibly real, “animals” let their animal instincts do the talking. Or fucking… as the case may be.

  1. Bronies

While not always a sexual act, there is definitely a level of sexuality that is involved. Bronies consist of “herds” made up of adult males who are pretty big fans of the series My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Full grown males dress up as their favorite characters from the show in a pseudo-sexual cosplay environment. They have parties and conventions, no different than any other mild obsession that’s been taken a little too far. Don’t feel too left out, if you’re of the female persuasion, they also accept our kind, we just don’t get a sweet moniker.

  1. Face Smashing

Face smashing is one of the most fascinating and confusing things to come out of the internet. Honestly, we’re still not entirely sure how this became associated with sex, but it is, and so we’re okay with it. A little confused maybe, but okay. Bukkake videos are sometimes considered the louder, cooler, brother of face smashing. While with Bukkake, a woman gets cum all over her face, with face smashing a women gets, well…. just about anything, all over her face. Generally food items, but also pillows, goo, playdough, and other malleable forms of soft, non-toxic, things are placed on a table. A women, generally asian, generally hot, then proceeds to smash her face into whatever soft spread of fun is in front of her. Loaves of bread and cakes are some of the biggest hitters in this new and exciting genre of “shit i can rub all over my face”.

  1. Frotteurism

Perhaps the most disturbing on the list- purely because it’s the only one that requires players of the non-consenting variety, Frotteurism is practiced by people who get off by rubbing themselves against unsuspecting participants. Luckily, this seems to only have really caught on in the U.K. but that doesn’t stop us of being super leary of an overcrowded subway.

  1. Horsey Play

Horsey play is a carefree throw back to the days of our youth, because what little girl didn’t want a pony? Or pretend they were one, majestically trotting around the front yard, envisioning their beautiful mane rippling in the wind behind them. Horse Play, like their cartoon obsessed cousins Bronies, doesn’t necessarily have a sexual aspect to it. However, looking at the overweight guy from accounting, dressed head to toe in patent leather with a bit in his mouth and a leather mask that looks like something you’d wake up next to after pissing off a mob boss, we tend to have a little trouble believing that. But, whatever. Essentially “horsey’s” dress up as the fun and fancy free spirit animal of freedom and run around playfully, being controlled by “equestrians”. Equestrians will ride their horseys or some of them have even been carriage trained, allowing their equestrian to instead be pulled around in all their S&M finery… Uhm. We’d like to go back to the Bukkake videos now. Kay? Thanks…